Romans 8:28

We are assured and know that [GOD BEING A PARTNER IN THEIR LABOR] all things work together and are [fitting into a plan] for good to and for those who love God and are called according to [His] design and purpose.
(Romans 8:28 AMP)

Last night I finished the book Kisses from Katie. It was an amazing book showing one young woman's work in Uganda and how Christ is using her to do HIS work one person at a time through HIS love & compassion. An underlying theme throughout the book - obedience. Oh, how I so desperately needed this word right now!

Let me paint a picture for you of where I have been and where I am. Last Friday Chris and I went into our 40 week appointment to check on Finley & to see how I was progressing. Finley got an A+ on the ultrasound & I was making progress. My dr then tells me she would love to induce me the next day, much to my surprise. I very quickly & firmly reminded her there was no need to induce & I had no intentions of doing so. After much talk back & forth we decided on Wednesday to be my induction date if Finley had not arrived by then.

I only told family & a few people within our circle that this was the plan, but always prefaced it with "if I decide to go through with it" because I didn't have peace with it. I even responded to a facebook post with the same response, which is when I really decided I was not ok with telling people we were waiting on God's timing & then were going to only wait a few days before making it our timing. I knew I could call & have them take my name off those books - and I wanted to so badly, but kept it to myself. I did NOT have peace with that plan.

Yesterday I was praying without really knowing what I was needing but I could tell God had something waiting for me. Chris called me from work & started on this entire conversation about how he didn't want me to feel any pressure at all from him about what to do with the induction(which had not even come up!) and that he was totally ok with waiting. We - as a couple - had not even discussed this option since the doctor's office; no wonder I didn't have peace! I get off the phone with Chris and my MIL called because she had my niece for a little bit & wondered if I wanted company - yes, please! Well, guess what Shelly had to say to me? Yup! She wanted to hear what I really thought about being induced since I had for so long said it would not be an option unless absolutely necessary and wanted to know what changed my mind. We talked about how I have had a textbook pregnancy and how I felt like everything I had given God - my pregnancy, my delivery, my body, my heart, my soul - I was taking back when I set that date for induction. I was planning what God needed to plan & what I had said from the very beginning was HIS. Peace fell all over me when I said outloud that I would take my name off the books. When I took matters out of my hands & put them back in HIS. My mom came over later & we talked about the same thing. to which she agreed as well. I now had my support system backing me up 100% and it felt so good! And let me say - even if it would have been only me & Chris that would have been just fine. We have to make decisions based on what is best for us and our family & what better time to start then now?

Let me also say that I am in no way saying induction is not ok, not an option, etc. Trust me - that is something each woman decides. I can only keep Finley in so long & know that God knows his exact birthday & I simply have to trust HIM. I am saying I was making a flesh decision based on my planning personality that would be easy for me - when in actuality it was harder - to take matters into my own hands for what I thought was my good. I didn't consult with the GREAT physician OR my husband and for that I have asked forgiveness & will move ahead.

I am so thankful for the people God has placed in my life that HE can speak through and work through when I am walking through a foggy area. And for my Jesus Calling devotion that helped open my eyes as well. His words through that book each night were exactly what I needed.

Here is a bit of what I read today - 2.7.12
"Remember that I can fit everything into a pattern for good, including the things you wish were different. Start with where you are at this point in time & space, accepting that this is where I intend you to be. You will get through today one step, one moment at a time. Your main responsibility is to remain attentive to me, letting me guide you through the many choices along your pathway."

2.4.12 - and what I read Saturday, day after scheduling the induction
"Do not wear yourself out with analyzing & planning. Instead, let thankfulness and trust be your guides through this day; they will keep you close to me."

I pray that someone else needs these words & finds peace in them. I know I have! And let me add this - I usually read my devotion at night and last night felt the Lord nudge me to leave it out so I could read it first thing this morning - like he had a surprise for me. Upon seeing Romans 8:28 I almost didn't look it up since I know it by heart, but had never read the AMP version. I read it outloud so Finley could hear it, but was quickly overtaken with tears knowing God has this verse waiting on me! An even better version of my favorite bible verse. We serve a wonderful God!

So Finley, when God is ready for you to arrive your mom & dad are waiting. But more importantly we are trusting & obeying Him to bring you in HIS PERFECT timing, just like we have prayed this entire time. Which makes it even more special!